Are you a cool mom?
By Julie Wu –mtltimes.ca
“Wish I could be like the cool moms with fancy haircuts, wear designer gear, have a cool job, run 10 km, laundry done, drive a nice car, kids wear cool clothes, get the grades, cool moms have the best playdates and throw the best parties…” Sometimes I try to be a “Cool Mom” but really, I think it’s better just to be me and flawed! I just had to share this great video parody “Cool Moms” created by a group of real moms.
But wait a minute, maybe I am a cool mom after all. My six year-old lost a tooth recently and though the Tooth Fairy almost forgot, she managed to get an envelope to her night table sometime around 2 am. Unfortunately, the envelope already had the Christmas money given by her grandfather and now plus the toonie. What a surprise she had that morning. She is ready to go to town and shop until she drops. What a generous tooth fairy! UGH, coolest tooth fairy (“mom”) ever!
We are all human. That voice in your head is always telling you that you are not good enough or at least you could do better. Maybe I would have been better off forgetting? Let’s lower our expectations… How can we as parents expect our children to be perfect when as adults we are still works in progress? Absolutely, we can all do better but at the same time, we should be kinder and respect ourselves more. Try not to be so critical, be realistic. Life is a journey. I think the Tooth Fairy made a mistake and may come back tonight to get what should have gone to the bank? We will mess up, forget and lose our tempers, we will sneak in an extra cookie or two or three, we’ll be late for that important meeting or event – but sometimes when we fall short, maybe we should give ourselves a break or a pass. Isn’t that a life lesson our children could benefit from? Afterall, they have been taught to treat their friends and others that way, why not themselves?
How you too can be a “true to yourself” Cool Mom:
Give your kids a break, remember to give them a pat on the back and treat them with something special such as a get together with a few friends because they deserve it.
Don’t stress them out too much but do talk about their responsibilities and believe in their potential.
Be affectionate with your kids whether it’s a squeeze of a hand or a hug but don’t overdo it if it makes them uncomfortable. The benefits of touch on our largest organ, our skin, can relax, reassure, sooth, bond and be potentially healing.
Inspire them. Talk about your accomplishments, your struggles and your failures. You or a mentor can motivate and encourage them in their everyday challenges. It’s happened to all of us.
Have faith and give them a little freedom in moderation but set limits, let them use their own judgment that you have taught them and perhaps a few mistakes too. They may surprise you.
Be a cool mom by understanding your children and listening to them. Their opinion counts but just be sure that they are not the ones setting the rules.
Be a Cool Mom in the sense you not freak out or panic when situations arise… play it cool, understand his or her side and don’t scream. Try to stay calm. Easier said than done but like I said, we all mess up and have bad days. Just keep working at it!
For information about AMCAL Family Services, visit www.amcal.ca or contact us at 514-694-3161.